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Here she is!

My beautiful bub!www.imagestation.com/albu...2132445941I'm not the best photographer, so I don't know if these do her justice...Lin

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From incubator to food dispenser :)

I really don't have much time for an update. I am supposed to be having a nap now Ella is finally asleep. I have been feeding her continuously from last night 6pm til this morning 8am with a 3 hour...

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How do I know...

... if Ella's too hot or too cold? If she is still hungry or just uses my nipple as a dummy? If she's tired or just wants a cuddle? It's all guess work isn't it?I worry especially about the...

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No time 4 anything

Haven't had much time for diary updates. Haven't had much time for anything.I had a shower this morning for the first time in 3 days! And I've managed to take the dog for a walk most days and go to...

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Bad night

I've had such a bad night. Ella woke every hour or so it seemed. And that was after I'd fed her for a few hours up until 10pm...Once she even woke half an hour after she'd fallen asleep at the...

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Bonding

A couple of people have asked me if I feel overwhelming love for Ella. I can't say that I am aware of such strong feelings... yet. I'm not worried about it either. It seems normal that it will take...

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My darling insomniac

What a steep learning curve Ella and I have been on!The first hurdle, learning how to breastfeed, we've tackled without effort. Now we're learning about sleeping.Yesterday I was at my wits end after...

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In love

Maybe it was partly triggered by the father's reaction to Ella yesterday, but I came to the realisation that I had been a bit standoffish towards her. As if I was afraid to get too attached to Ella...

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Photos

I added some more photos of Ella and Luna (my very protective dog) to my online album: www.imagestation.com/albu...2132445941For those who don't want to get a login, use mine:username: linvanpassword:...

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Coping

Looking after a newborn baby is proving harder than I had expected. I am coping, but some days only just.We have our good days too. Like yesterday I actually managed to do the dishes, hang up the...

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Advice and negative feedback on parenting

The main reason why I felt so confused and helpless those first few weeks with Ella was because everyone was giving me advice based on their own experiences and I didn't know who to believe. I easily...

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The father

As I knew I would, I have been really enjoying seeing the father's reaction to Ella.He now seems genuinely interested in anything I say about her and in my ideas and doubts about child rearing. He...

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Bonding... again

I've read so much about bonding. About how some parents get overwhelmed by love as soon as they lay eyes on their newborn, and how for others it can take much longer. I've read about the guilt of...

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Smile

A second post today, cause I wanted to add something positive.Ella now smiles at me when I greet her when she wakes up from a nap! Which of course melts my heart and I instantly forget the trouble it...

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Dr Jekyll and Mrs Hyde

That's my daughter! Today she's been so good. By which I mean she goes to sleep about 20 minutes after I put her to bed with minimal crying.We'll see how long it lasts befor Mrs Hyde comes back. I...

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Where we're at

Ella's on a combination of breast and bottle now. She'll take a wile to get used to the bottle, but once she starts sucking she seems to like it. I might have to experiment with formula, cause she did...

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Happy families

I went to a bbq yesterday at a friend's place. There were 5 kids when I arrived - 3 3yos and 2 18 month olds - and I was the only single person there. I got a bit teary watching these happy families,...

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Pure joy!

Could there be anything more joyous than a little baby's smile? Ella laughs without sound when she looks at my face when she wakes up from a nap. She laughs when I sing to her or talk to her in a...

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First outing without Ella

I left Ella alone for the first time today. I left her at home with my mum while I went over to my ex who was going to help me move some furniture from a friend's place to mine. I was gone for about 1...

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To Ella, with love

This truly is my last diary entry. This time it's for real!I could write pages and pages about my experiences as Ella's mum. But I'm sure all of you could about your kids too. And we can't all have a...

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